Thankful Thursday

Today has been a crazy day.

I work from home, but this morning I had to go in to a client's to help them with their accounting system. I guesstimated one hour, two tops. Four hours later, I was finally done and on my way.

Sadly, I wasn't heading home, but to the mechanics, as our heater hasn't been working for a couple weeks now and it was time to admit that it needed some help (plus, the burning smell...couldn't mean anything good). I drop my car off, but now it's pouring and I've got a good half hour's walk ahead of me since the mechanic had no courtesy cars left. Meanwhile I'm imagining my poor boy at home, nearly five hours since I left and now his naptime. I just hoped the neighbours didn't complain about the wailing that was sure to be happening.

And then this lady, another customer, offers to give me a ride home! I gratefully accept and ten minutes later I'm unlocking the door to our home, after thanking the lady profusely and being told to pass it on if I can (I absolutely will!). I don't hear any screaming yet. This is good. I open the door and find, not my son crying, but my husband moaning. He's been sick ever since I left, he tells me, but the little guy has been an absolute angel for him (phew!).

After a few minutes of rushing around changing a diaper and getting a load of wash going, I get both my men settled into our bed for a nap. Shhhh, they're sleeping.

So after that crazy morning, I need to pull out the bits I'm especially thankful for:

* Having a sweet little boy who will sit on the couch at his sick daddy's feet, reading books quietly to himself.

* Having a wonderful husband who, despite spending five hours watching said boy by himself while shaking and throwing up and feeling generally miserable, doesn't grumble in the least when I finally get back home.

* Having a kind stranger offer to drive me home so that I don't have to walk through the rain.

* Having heat in my car again, and a repair bill that isn't too frightening.

* Having a job that usually allows me to work from home.

Now to continue knitting a tiny little hat for Mama to Mama's Caps to Cap-Haitien Project, and wait for my boys to wake up from their nap.

International Babywearing Week

From the Babywearing International website:

Benefits of Babywearing

Medical professionals agree that infants thrive through touch; “wearing” your baby is another way to meet this need. But the benefits of babywearing don’t end there...babywearing offers many other advantages, some of which include:

• Happy Babies. It’s true … carried babies cry less! In a study published in the journal Pediatrics, researchers found that babywearing for three hours a day reduced infant crying by 43 percent overall and 54 percent during evening hours.

• Healthy Babies. Premature babies and babies with special needs often enter the world with fragile nervous systems. When a baby rides in a sling attached to his mother, he is in tune with the rhythm of her breathing, the sound of her heartbeat, and the movements his mother makes—walking, bending, and reaching. This stimulation helps him to regulate his own physical responses. Research has even shown that premature babies who are touched and held gain weight faster and are healthier than babies who are not.

• Confident Parents. A large part of feeling confident as a parent is the ability to read our babies’ cues successfully. Holding our babies close in a sling allows us to become finely attuned to their movements, gestures, and facial expressions. Every time a baby is able to let us know that she is hungry, bored, or wet without having to cry, her trust in us is increased, her learning is enhanced, and our own confidence is reinforced. This cycle of positive interaction deepens the mutual attachment between parent and child, and is especially beneficial for mothers who are at risk for or suffering from postpartum depression.

• Loving Caregivers. Baby carriers are a great bonding tool for fathers, grandparents, adoptive parents, babysitters, and other caregivers. Imagine a new father going for a walk with his baby in a sling. The baby isbecoming used to his voice, heartbeat, movements, and facial expressions, and the two are forging a strong attachment of their own. Baby carriers are beneficial for every adult in a baby’s life. Cuddling up close in the sling is a wonderful way to get to know the baby in your life, and for the baby to get to know you!

• Comfort and Convenience. With the help of a good carrier, you can take care of older children or do chores without frequent interruptions from an anxious or distressed infant—which helps to reduce sibling rivalry. Baby carriers are also wonderful to use with older babies and toddlers; you can save those arms and go where strollers can’t. Climbing stairs, hiking, and navigating crowded airports all can be done with ease when you use a well-designed baby carrier!

Babywearing has been wonderful for us. From the time our son was an infant, we've found it be more useful than we ever could have imagined. From those early days when he napped better snuggled close to a warm body, to long days of teething, to walking outdoors in the snowy Canadian winters, to innumerable other instances, babywearing has saved my sanity. And that's with only one child! I can imagine the benefits only increasing with each new child, allowing two hands free to chase after silly toddlers, prepare meals for hungry children, and take care of all the other demands of parenting that can't always be done with a babe in arms. And on top of that are all the benefits to the baby - and a few more!

Lest We Forget

We spent the morning at the Remembrance Day ceremonies. We were way in the back and couldn't see much, but like my husband said to me, it was just the act of being there that mattered, spending an hour in the cold in thanks and honour for those who fought and even died for our freedom.


In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders Fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders Fields.

- John McCrae

"To you from failing hands we throw the torch; be yours to hold it high. If ye break faith with us who die..." May we continue to fight for freedom every day.

Homosexual marriage

At the risk of sounding snarky (I don't mean to!), I honestly don't understand some things surrounding the whole homosexual marriage issue. On both sides. So however you feel about it, feel free to chime in and edumacate me.

Let's start with the people who are for homosexual marriage, since it's the easier of the two. For the most part, I understand. But just focusing on one little thing - I absolutely understand why supporters would want same-sex unions of some sort. I don't need any clarification in that regard. What I don't understand is why supporters want to change the definition of marriage itself in order to allow for same-sex marriage, especially in places where same-sex unions are allowed and are granted the same rights as married couples. Why is a civil union with rights equivalent to marriage unsatisfactory?

Now, moving on to those who are against same-sex marriage and/or same-sex unions. If you are not a Christian and are against either/or, why? It actually shocks me that same-sex unions are still limited to only a handful of states, as the only people I ever hear speaking against this are those who are against it for religious reasons. I don't understand why, unless one is a Christian and believes homesexuality to be a sin, one would be opposed to this?

And now for the majority - Christians who are against same-sex marriage and/or unions. If you are against same-sex marriage, I more or less understand where you're coming from. But for those who are against even same-sex unions on a religious basis...why?

As Christians, we believe the Bible tells us that homosexuality is a sin. But we believe lots of other things are sins too - including other things related to marriage. How about common-law marriage? Cohabitation? Domestic partnerships? What about premarital sex? What about divorce, which God says He hates?

Why shouldn't all these things be illegal too? If marriage is so sacred, then why aren't Christians lobbying against these things the way they are against same-sex unions, or even homosexuality in general?

And if all sins, no matter how small, are enough to separate us from a holy God, then what about making those "small" sins illegal too? Lying? Greed? Arrogance? Gossip?

It seems that many of us as Christians feel it is our duty to legislate our morals. What makes us think we should be able to tell others what to do, and even to force them to do it through laws? Do we think we can bring salvation through laws? And if so, isn't that the whole point of the gospel, that the law - whether religious law or governmental law - cannot save us? That we need a Saviour? Isn't that what the Law was supposed to show us?

I do not in any way believe that churches should perform same-sex marriages or blessings. As a member of the Anglican church, this is an issue that touches very close to home for me, as the Anglican Church of Canada and the Episcopal Church of the USA have both split over this very issue. We belong to a church that has chosen to reject the idea of the church blessing or performing same-sex marriages, as we do not believe the church should ever bless something which the Bible says in a sin.

But the law has nothing to do with Christianity, and we should hope it remains so. One day, should it become illegal to preach or read God's Word, will you obey the law then? And as for what the world does? We cannot (and should not) force them to conform to our morals and beliefs, nor even expect them to - for why would they? Would you obey Islam's commands if you did not believe in Allah or follow that particular religion?

Maybe we should start by showing the world Jesus.

Sweet dreams

Hush little baby, don't say a word,
Momma's gonna buy you a mocking bird.
Last night as I was laying in bed beside my little boy putting him to sleep, he snuggled up against me and put his arm around me, resting his tiny hand on my back. I think I melted. It got me thinking back over the months of co-sleeping - months of little fingers grasping mine, months of warm snuggles, months of peaceful sleeps and easy wake-ups.

If that mocking bird don't sing,
Momma's gonna buy you a diamond ring.
It also got me thinking back to how our co-sleeping began. We hadn't planned to co-sleep, not really, but we knew we wanted our baby close in those first few months. He had a bassinet right next to our bed. He slept in it at night and during the occasional nap - the rest of his naps he slept either on my lap or snuggled close in a baby carrier (usually a wrap back in those days).

If that diamond ring turns brass,
Momma's gonna buy you a looking glass.
This worked for a while. We were extremely spoiled with a baby who slept six hours straight each night by the time he was a week old, and slept ten hour stretches by the time he was a month old. Like I said, extremely spoiled. But he started making up for it when he turned 3 months old (as those early sleeping babies are prone to do), waking up first once each night, then twice, then more and more until he was up nearly every.single.hour for a stretch of I-was-too-tired-to-remember-how-many weeks.

If that looking glass gets broke,
Momma's gonna buy you a billy goat.
Exhaustion. At first I kept up the whole bassinet thing. He'd wake up for food, I'd sit up and feed him, try not to fall asleep, change his diaper, and put him back to sleep in the bassinet. Repeat as many times as he woke up in a night.

If that billy goat won't pull,
Momma's gonna buy you a cart and bull.
One night it was same as usual - he woke up, I fed him. Suddenly, I don't know how much later, I snapped awake in a full-out panic and realized I had no idea where my baby was, had no memory of putting him back to sleep, the light was still on, and oh-my-goodness where was he and was he okay and how could I do such a thing? I frantically searched the bed and the floor. Finally I noticed him sound asleep in his bassinet - apparently I had put him back to sleep after all, despite having no memory of it and having fallen back asleep with the light on.

If that cart and bull turns over,
Momma's gonna buy you a dog named Rover.
From that night on, he slept with us. When he woke up, I'd latch him on and we'd both lie there peacefully until we fell asleep again. He didn't start consistently sleeping through the night again until he was a year old, but co-sleeping made it so much more bearable. We both got more sleep because of it. But more than that, there's just something so sweet and so natural and so right about having your children tucked up beside you while you sleep at night. Now that we do it, I couldn't imagine it any other way.

If that dog named Rover won't bark,
Momma's gonna buy you a horse and cart.
We still nurse to sleep most nights, but we've had a few nights lately where he's fallen asleep with me kneeling down beside the bed and singing to him instead. He even has his favourite songs already. He'll point at my mouth when he wants me to start singing. If it's not the song he wants, he'll cover my mouth with his hand until I stop, then point at it again for a new song. When I finally start singing the song he wants, he breaks out into a big grin and lets out one of his adorable little maniacal giggles that I love so much.

And if that horse and cart fall down,
You'll still be the sweetest little baby in town.
Much to my chagrin, he has decided that his favourite song is Hush Little Baby. While I am pleased to have finally memorized the lyrics to this song (I used to always get confused somewhere around the looking glass breaking), it's never been one of my favourites. I mean, what a materialistic song! I most certainly will not buy him all of those things! I think I should rewrite it, sing him my own version.

Hush Little Baby, don't you cry,
Momma's gonna sing you a lullaby.

When your blue eyes start to close,
Momma's gonna kiss you on your nose.

When you wake all bleary-eyed,
Momma's gonna be right at your side.

When the laundry must be done,
Momma's gonna let you in on all the fun...
And so on and so forth. Brilliant, no?

Week one over!

Week One of NaBloPoMo is over - so far so good! Irritatingly enough, though, instead of having less post drafts waiting for me to finish, I now have more. So much to write about, so little time to write.

Half-written blog posts aside, is there anything you would like me to blog about? I'm always more than open to questions, writing prompts, topic requests and any other inspiration you may have for me!

My hopes for you, Child

Child,

I hope you always know you are loved.


Child,

I hope you do right because you believe it is right.

I hope you will love and serve others.

I hope you will love yourself as well.

I hope you will be compassionate.

I hope that the fruit of the Spirit is evident in your life:
love,
joy,
peace,
patience,
kindness,
goodness,
faithfulness,
gentleness,
self-control.


Child,

I hope you come to know and to love God.

I hope you will discover the joy and peace of an ever-growing relationship with Jesus Christ, becoming His joyful disciple.

I hope you put your faith and trust in Him and find there the peace that passes all understanding.

I hope you question everything you're told, and I hope your basis for truth is always the Bible.


Child,

I hope you fight for the Truth in all things.

I hope you have an inquisitive spirit, never afraid to dig deeper.

I hope you trust generally, but trust your heart and intuition when they sense danger.

I hope you don't always do what you're told.


Child,

I hope you work hard to achieve your goals.

I hope you will be wise, discerning, and responsible.

I hope you grow to become secure, confident, and joyful.

I hope you will honour and follow your God-given bent and always seek His guidance.


Child,

I hope you will always feel safe bringing your struggles of any sort to your parents.

I hope you will always sense our love and support and know that we are praying for you.

I hope you will have a loving and secure marriage, serving each other with mutual adoration, respect, and submission.

I hope you are blessed with children of your own to love and nurture into maturity.


Child,

I hope you look back on your childhood and smile.

I hope you enjoy and appreciate nature in all its forms.

I hope your life is filled with creativity and imagination.

I hope you will have an unquenchable thirst for knowledge, ever learning and ever putting that knowledge to practical use.


Child,

I hope you live your life always in the present, but with an eye towards Heaven.

I hope you approach life with passion and wild abandon, but find balance and serenity in life as well.


Child,

I hope that my actions towards you will always bear witness to these hopes I have for you.

"Are my everyday practices likely to help my children grow into the kind of people I'd like them to be? When we fail to examine our objectives we're left by default with practices that are intended solely to get kids to do what they're told."
Alfie Kohn, "Unconditional Parenting"

What about you? What are your hopes for your children?